I have finally played Outer Wilds! I have yet to complete the DLC, but I wanted to write some things down while I'm still strapping into the ship.
So as you may expect, like everyone else that suggests playing this game, I would highly recommend playing it as spoiler-free as you can! It's a game all about mystery and discovery. The notes will hit so much more. That being said, I had a friend help me when I'm absolutely stuck or too full of fear to progress, so I think gentle help can be nice.
Achieving Liftoff
I remember when I gave this game a real start, I was really scared of... most of the planets. I started with the Attlerock, Timber Hearth's moon. I remember lamenting having to go out further than that... but one huge driving factor for me is being able to read more of the Nomai's texts. Translating things the Nomai put down was just such an engrossing reward for exploring that I would start to brave the planets out there...
The Hourglass Twins were scary prospects due to the ABSURD proximity to the flaming and enormous SUN. Utterly terrifying! My friend Junie watched me just look up as the Sun passed slowly overhead, seemingly close enough to just reach up and touch it. The atmosphere you feel from the sound design is phenomenal... I often found myself just sitting and looking around as these celestial bodies swung around each other. The word 'awe' feels appropriate, I wouldn't say it's just terror. It's just awe-inspiring, awesome, awful. Love it.
Ash Twin was not a planet I could really figure out for most of the game. There was obviously an hourglass effect with the sand, but I had no idea what to do with those big glowy prong towers... and the other towers, I had no texts I could use to figure out how they work. Plus the Sun being right there...
For Ember Twin though, I could see there was some neat stuff going on right away. Plus it has Chert, the egg themself. I sorta wish I could talk to Chert about more, but everything that I could talk to them about was, uh... concerning. Anyway, it turned out to be the most aggravating planet for sure for a time -- everything is timed pretty tightly, it's hard!! I like it still though.
I actually ignored exploring Timber Hearth for a time, because I thought there was nothing to see... There is the bramble seed of course, threatening the planet with an uncertain fate, but there are also writings to be found underneath the geysers, and a large scale mining operation beyond a bridge... There was also the haunting and mystifying quantum forest, which I will forever remember as the place that I got absolutely fucked up by landing my ship inside of it. Do not do this. It is hilarious though. Actually maybe do this.
Giant's Deep was so terrifying for me personally that I avoided it for quite some time... First of all, I'm ALREADY scared of deep space! The planet is also obscured by eternally raging storms, and has intense gravity that will pull you in a little quicker than you expect. The world is almost entirely composed of a deep turbulent ocean, with gravity levels that keep you from flying out of the water with your jetpacks, keeping you mostly submerged. I have a fear of deep oceans and tornadoes, so the murky and deep ocean coupled with the cyclones was so difficult for me to power through that I'd just stand in a cyclone protection spot for 10 minutes and occasionally peek out, because I didn't want to get flown away or fall into the ocean. I remembered seeing something moving and glowing red in the depths below...
... This is one instance where my friend Junie had to assure me that there were no monsters in the water, and it was unlikely that I'd get hurt. Sometimes you gotta get some help. With this shield for my heart to hang onto, I eventually explored Giant's Deep in earnest, though I did put it off as long as possible (which is to say, before Dark Bramble and The Interloper)
Brittle Hollow with its moon, Hollow's Lantern... Genuinely funny how I ended up feeling the planet with the black hole in the center was like my home, my comfortable spot when the other planets were too stressful or intimidating. I think a large part of it is the lower gravity and the potential to do some crazy jetpack parkour. Not so low that I'd immediately be flung into outer space, but low enough where your jets are vital for traversal... Anyway, I love this place, at least in the game. When I need some company, I can go to hang out with Riebeck and listen to their banjo as the end comes once more.
I went the wrong way a few times, trying to reach the icy portion of the planet through the gravity stones underneath the planet's crust. Might've fallen down several hundred feet instead of looking for the gravity stones, a couple of times... Look, I'm an eager explorer when I get to rely on my jetpack jumps.
The Interloper took some time to look into. Honestly surprised I did not get my ship blown up getting beaned by it, although I did get close. I thought it might be something small and quick to explore, like the Attlerock, and... that's sort of true but also really, really not.
I did peek into the Dark Bramble relatively early, discovered the horror that is giant space anglerfish, died, and decided I would rather avoid it as long as hearthianly possible. And the sounds you hear in there... the intense fog... it's so meticulously crafted to be the worst. I knew I would have to one day, but I was never sure if I could conquer it in the end. I'm just not really that good with horror games, and uh... yeah.
All that to say, I had a lot of thoughts on each planet as I started out. Some of them just being "I DON'T WANNA BE HERE" but I digress.
Outer Wilds Funniest Home Videos
It doesn't always come up because I can get really fatigued by the amount of exploring you sort of have to do to complete games, but I do like to explore if this game is any indication. All the secrets!!! So many secrets!! Filling out the ship log feels so good. And I'm glad that the game pauses to let you read, although I have definitely had to speed read at the end of a loop as that hauntingly beautiful tune played out once again.
OK funny stories to share: yes of course I walked out without the suit a couple times. Lucky me, the first or second life that I had my friend Junie watching, I walked out and died, after being so diligent several times before. what the heck!!! Embarrassing!
Do not park in the quantum grove. The quantum grove can and will fuck you up. I didn't even see the rocks moving around, but my ship obscured most of them, and that empty spot I landed in? yeah it was empty because a rock was ready to spawn there. THE SHIP WAS COMPLETELY FINE IT JUST THUMPED ME SPECIFICALLY.
I won't lie, I was a little terrified of being near a quantum spot after that point, even though it was specifically the context of being in the ship that almost certainly caused it... I held my breath like I was about to get punched in the gut.....
Speaking of physics shenanigans, I happened to fire a scout through a Dark Bramble hole and entered through the portal at the same exact time that the scout entered a hole inside the hole and it cracked the ship's glass as it manifested violently into the cockpit. I wish I recorded it, I wonder how often that happens to people??
Has there ever been a game that so often made me tense up without being a frustrating pain in the ass? I love this game. It's so deceptively scary though.
Into the Wilds
The Nomai writing is undoubtedly one of my very favorite aspects of the game. You never know what you'll get, although after a while, you can guess the manner of writing before you... Conversations, tangents, scribbling of children, proper informative writing of an adult... They're all nerds though, all of them!! I can't help but adore them for it, though. I love the joy and excitement over science.
But the joy comes with... a wave of absolute and utter grief. They had no chance. The Interloper came out of nowhere, wiping them out by sheer shitty luck and something akin to radiation... What can you even say about that? That's such an... everything. It was hundreds of thousands of years ago, by the time you've seen them. I'm a bit sensitive to like, gut punches meant to shock you, but this was handled so well it's just like... a very difficult to articulate feeling of sadness, you know?
I am also a very sentimental person, though, and while Solanum's quantum-locked state is both difficult and miraculous, I am above all so, so glad I could talk with her. And we've become friends, in the middle of all of this. It's a really beautiful thing that fills me with happiness. which is especially nice because oh my god the Quantum Moon is a terror to land on and explore (I kinda love it now though, except the time I fuckin beefed it and didn't realize the ship was about to explode right next to me)
Anyway, gosh! I was enamored going through this game once I truly picked it up and played it, and playing it for a friend to observe who's already been through it all was a lot of fun. I know how it is to be in that position, and it is a HUGE delight, plus I could ask for help if I needed it! I feel like I contributed to net happiness with this venture~
Once I had all the pieces together... man I was terrified. Taking out the warp core and making the final journey as the music swells... I don't know if I've ever felt so locked in to a final sequence. The loop ending music was always vaguely haunting, but now, it hits so different...!! Not to mention the most terrifying journey through Dark Bramble in existence. Those bastards are everywhere, and you have to float quietly and slowly through the space or it's all over. AUGHHHH I am proud of my piloting skills though because I nailed it the first try :')
I felt so many feelings in that ending sequence
It's very cold and scary and alien, but also, beautiful, but also, harrowing, but also, awesome and awful...
... But, seeing familiar faces and a campfire to roast marshmallows on, it gave me a nice blanketed feeling to enjoy. I know it's probably more like, figments of our imagination, but... man. It's just nice to be there together at the end. I really, really liked hearing from everyone as I traveled and explored and screamed at anglerfish, so seeing them again made me happy. Also my newest friend Solanum?? Hell yes!
I love the imagery of this idea... planting a tree that you won't be around to live under. I somewhat lament going through it at night when I was tired since I just want to give this game the amount of attention and emotional investment as possible, but I was very much hooked in completely rather than distracted, so perhaps I shouldn't be critical of myself.
After finally taking the jump and looking out, I tried to absorb what I was looking at, looking around a little, until all of the everything swept me up in a glorious bang. God, how do you even express that feeling??
I remember the heavy feeling of wanting to stare into the sky for like, hours, as the credits rolled. I didn't cry, but I felt like I was feeling every emotion at once, so maybe it's okay to let myself react however it shakes out.
I am not really that good with words, but I really wanted to express something, write something down, about this really moving experience I had with this game. I feel bad that I hadn't given it a shot for a few years, but I'm super happy that I did. Thank you Ehks for the gift!
also needless to say, the thing with the high energy lab black hole... magnificent.
Unfinished Business
So I write this 2 months after writing the first portion of this blog post, trying to resume my thoughts... This game is really something special - it always feels completely tangible and overwhelming and fascinating. I still have the DLC to progress through, but I couldn't help but grab a bunch of cool merchandise from Fangamer to really celebrate this wondrous experience. SERIOUSLY THOUGH LOOK AT THIS!!!
When I saw that there was not only official merch, but that THIS was gonna get restocked soon? my god I could not get that any faster. I also got a really nice shirt of an astronaut floating around mysterious Nomai texts, marshmallow on a stick nearby of course :)
I think I've written a bit repetitively, but it's OK, I'd just like to put something out and not let my feelings wander away from my mind even more than they have.
Besides, I still have to get terrorized by some creepypasta aliens... whenever I can work up the nerve for it... Until then, fellow astronauts!